TheDuckWalk.com

I know every man on earth wants to believe this is au natural, but come on...common sense is key.

Someone please explain to me how and why this is attractive. Thanks. Not hating, just seeking clarification.

Q: I'm concerned, because I'm in my late 20's and my mother wants me to get married. What should I say? ~ Jazmine

A: I have yet to understand why some parents get so weird about their kids getting married before a certain age. Perhaps I can't relate because that's the one thing I don't have to worry about from my parents. I've, luckily, never been pressured to get hitched or get knocked up. But if I did, I'd tell 'em to back the hell off and gimme some space. Well, not in those terms since they'd most likely slap me into next week, but you know what I'm saying. This is the 21st century for crying out loud! The average age at (the first) marriage has steadily increased since...forever.

My parents got married in '66, when my mom was just 20. I did my research (No, I don't just ramble about things. I do know some stuff and check my sources. haha!). Back in the 60s, the average age for women to get married was 20.3. Look like Mom was right on track. In 2007, the average age was 26 for women. Let's see here...I'm 27. OH NO! I'm past the average age to get married. Somebody alert the authorities! DAMN! My life is over!

Gimme a break.

But wait! If it's the average, then that means some people are older than the average and some are younger when they get married, right? Okay, so what's the big deal?

It seems to me that parents should be more concerned with their kid being happy, than their own seemingly selfish need for grandbabies and son-in-laws that can help clean out the attic. It's also seems that more women feel this pressure than men. I attribute that to our own self-inflicted ideas of when we should be married, on top of pressure from parents, soon-to-be-hitched friends, and the WE channel's insatiable need to inundate us with damn-near 24 hours of incessant wedding programming 365 days a year. Men don't deal with that nonesense. You ever seen Groomzillas on ESPN?

Sure she wants you to get married and be happy. But getting married to the next thing with opposite parts just to make her happy won't do a thing for your personal satisfaction. Tell Moms you are in search of a significant other...not a ring and sperm donor. You will get married when you find someone who makes you happy and not a moment before. You're in the late 20s...which means you're probably knocking on 30. Time to put your foot down. And if she doesn't cease and desist the chatter about how you're not getting any older, halt the convo immediately when you hear her starting to go in that direction. But be nice about it, of course. At the end of the day, she undoubtedly has your best interest at heart.

One thing that has always fascinated me between men and women is the stark difference between each other’s mind. It’s no secret that men like to keep things bottled up and can really only focus or think on one thing at a time, while women express their feelings and thing about many different things at the speed of flapping hummingbird wings. With all differences being considered, how is it possible to make these two co-exist? I’ll try my best to explain my opinion on the matter.

Let’s start with the ladies shall we? Women are born psychologists. They know how to open up, discuss feelings and try to figure out what is going on in a person’s mind. This is why women get so frustrated when their man won’t open up to them. However, sometimes getting a man to share his feelings is like dragging a dog to the vet: they won’t go in the door without a fight! This reasoning is why women tend to put the screws to their man in hopes of forcing him to talk, which is a method that sometimes works (believe me, I know!), but usually makes him want to keep things bottled up even more or just say something to get you off his back. Try having a casual conversation and bring up certain issues (like why he hasn’t committed to you after 2 years of dating) in a non-threatening kind of way. It might encourage him to open up a little more.

Men: why are we so simple and not nearly as complicated as women? We will never know! What is truly unique about guys is we can’t focus on more than one thing at once. This is why we tend to tune out our girlfriend when the game is on or a television show we want to watch. It’s also the reason we forgot something our woman told us in the morning to pick up after work because our focus is on work and we don’t think about anything else. So when we get home and are met with an ear full of expletives for not remembering to get milk after work, can you really blame us? Well, sure you can, which is why you both need to get a schedule drawn up to outline what needs to be done. Assign certain things to each other so you know what is expected. A man may not always follow suit, but it will encourage improvement over his Neanderthal ways!

So there you have it! I could go on and on about this topic, but I don’t want to write the Great American Novel about relationships (well, on second thought….). Besides, the above tips will either make sense or sound incredible cliché or stupid. Either way, I will let you be the judge!

A while ago, Oprah did a show called "The Race Machine", where she and her audience members were able to use some kind of technology to find out what they'd look like as a member of a different race. Well, evidently, that technology cost a lot of moolah. But now, University of St. Andrews College in Scotland has developed a similar, yet cost-effective (read: FREE) web-based version. Check out my results. My fave is at the very bottom:

Boy, oh boy, the things I hear on my beloved Elvis Duran in the Morning Show. A woman decides to phone tap her husband on the radio by pretending to have been having an affair for four months. Little does she know, the morning show contacted him ahead of time to forewarn him. He ends up flipping the script and phone taps her by telling her that he, too, has been having an affair with someone at his office. Lawd hammercy, why did he do that? She goes OFF! OMG...so funny! I was super uncomfortable listening to this until I found out he was joking. You've gotta hear it. Click the image below to listen!

1. Pick the title you're most interested in.

2. Email admin@theduckwalk.com telling us your reasoning for wanting that particular book. Be creative!

3. One winner will be selected for each title, so be creative, be funny, think outside the cube! Good luck!


I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU by Lucinda Rosenfeld

A funny, razor-sharp novel about the darker, more competitive side of female friendship.










HOLLYWOOD IS LIKE HIGH SCHOOL WITH MONEY by Zoey Dean

Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office meets Mean Girls in this new novel from the author of HOW TO TEACH FILTHY RICH GIRLS (inspiration for The CW series “Privileged”) and the A-LIST series.








DEAD MEN’S BOOTS by Mike Carey

In the tradition of bestselling authors Neil Gaiman and Jim Butcher, famous comic book writer Mike Carey offers his third supernatural
thriller featuring London-based freelance exorcist Felix Castor.









GET REAL by Donald E. Westlake

John Dortmunder returns in another hilarious caper by the legendary Grand Master of mystery and suspense, Donald E. Westlake.

I’ve decided to go a little off topic today and discuss fitness, more specifically, how to tone up your gluteus maximus (the technical term for what the kids call ‘booty’). Actually, this isn’t off topic at all! If you get your butt into rock hard shape, you are bound to turn a few heads which will result in more dates and possibly a meaningful relationship. So below are a few tips to help turn your hind quarters into a work of art:

1) SQUAT VARIATION: Most of us know what squats are and there is an additional technique to this exercise to help target those glutes a bit more. After you have come down until your thighs are parallel to the floor, come back up to the starting position, but squeeze you buns together as hard as you can and hold it for 3 seconds. The impending burning sensation you will feel is orgasmic!

2) STIFF LEGGED DEADLIFT: Grab a light amount of weight in the form of a barbell. Stand with your feet shoulder width apart, keeping your knees slightly bent and holding the weight at waist level. Lower the weight down until it comes an inch from the floor, feeling a good stretch in the hamstrings, then return up to the starting position. Once at the top, squeeze the life out of your glutes, which will cause you to lean back slightly. The feeling is similar to the squat variation.

3) LEG PRESS ISOLATION: Find the leg press machine and put some light weight on. You will only be using one leg at a time for this one. Position your foot at an angle pointing outward. Lower the weight down until your thigh touches your chest. Once you return the weight to the starting position, you’ll notice your behind has no choice but to contract, so hold that for 3 seconds, making sure you squeeze your glutes to the fullest extent.

Give these exercises a shot! There’s nothing sexier than a solid, well shaped booty (from a superficial standpoint anyway!). Plus, summer is here and I need to get you ladies into bikini shape so I can observe you splashing in the water and playing volleyball on the beach from afar with my binoculars. That doesn’t sound creepy does it? At any rate, please don’t tell my girlfriend I said that!

Get more exercise and health tips on my website: www.jbeckfitness.com!

From Condomunity.com - The new film for Durex takes a decidedly comedic twist (um...position?) on encouraging the use of its products in the US. The short is called "Get it On" and done by the excellent Süperfad team. All video credits and sincere thanks Superfad.com.